I Am @ Youth.SG

There's a blogging competition that's going on. Check it out at http://www.youth.sg Though today is actually the last day for entry... :P

Kinda expected from me. I've been so busy busy busy with all my assignments that's going on with my course.

Let's see. Let's first start with the reason why I am always so busy - I am an Architecture student in NUS, first year. "Glamorous course," you say... "No exams," you say... Yeah right. Almost every waking hour is spent developing and perfecting our designs to present it somewhere near the end of the semester to a panel of tutors who would most probably shoot it down. Yeah... it's THAT bad. All this, while having to juggle other modules as well. (I'm currently taking Basic Chinese as one of my modules besides my other core modules.)

"Why are you still in that course then?" you may ask... Well... If I had to simply give ONE reason, I LOVE DESIGNING!!

Can I have another reason please? :P I don't wanna end up in a job where it's simply repetition and where I'm doing something which I have simply no interest for. I cant imagine myself being a major in Arts or Science. Though I took Science in JC... It's not that I don't like those subjects, in fact I loved taking Science in JC and deciphering the human psyche, about the world around me and stuff like that. But I cant imagine working in those fields.

Since young, I've had interest in designing or just arts and the Arts as well. I was just looking through some of my old primary school journals where you have to write about what you want to be when you grow up. And you know what I wrote? An artist. :D Okay... so I kinda deviated a lil, but being an "artist" is not very practical in Singapore or anywhere else for that matter. So I needed to be a specific kind of artist. During JAE after my 'O' levels, most of my choices were actually design courses - ranging from architecture, to interior design, to fashion design, to digital media design and stuff like that. I simply wanted to be somewhere where I could develop my creativity. (But I ended up in JC coz I had friends there, and I couldn't decide what kind of design I wanted to specialise in. :P) So I took the opportunity in NUS to study a design-related course. Yeah.

It's tough but I love it. :)

Though life isn't always so peachy. I have to admit, I don't come from a family that's too well off. But my course kinda requires us to spend quite a lot on materials, books, and believe it or not paper... Only my dad's working and only takes home about 1000 or so per month, mum used to work but she's sick now. Even though we really need the money but we'd rather her stay home a rest. Initially, I wanted to take up a part-time job, maybe sales or tutoring jobs. But my course just takes up all my time. So I'm really struggling.

Just now, I wrote about what I wanted to be when I grew up when I was still in Primary School. If you ask me now... I would say, I just want to have a good paying job where I can simply provide my parents with a good life when they're in their golden years. Filial piety you say? More like they've worked their asses off to bring me, my sis, and my brother up... It's the least I can do for them. I've never remembered feeling at any disadvantage or lacking anything when I was young. I had toys (mostly hand-me-downs from my older siblings, the only thing that was mine was a doll which could change her hairstyles :P), new Baju Kurungs every Hari Raya, a lot of good food (mum's a great cook!), pets and I had them. When I got older I realized something. Though I had new clothes for Hari Raya, my mum didn't. She always gave the reason that they didn't have her size (She's an XXXL.) or she simply didn't have the time to get one. But that wasn't it... she would always put us first.

A lot of my friends view going into the working world as getting independence, maybe even getting away from their family. For me, it's to make sure simply there's food on the table for my family, my parents don't have to work till they're old and grey, and giving back to my parents. Even when I worked part-time after my 'A' levels, out of my $700+ pay, my parents would get at least $150, so it at least helped them out or at least paid for my mum's medical fees. But now that I'm not working, it's hard.

The government is always saying that Singapore’s economy is better, standard of living is rising, higher income, blah, blah, blah. But there are families like mine who are stuck. Where a difference of $6, doesn’t put us in the lower income group who earn less than $1200. Rawr. Sorry. Just griping. I cant help it.

I just wish life was a little better now.

I want to help out other people as well. I’m not too well off, but I know there’re always others who are worse off than me, so I thank my lucky stars that I’m able to continue studying, still have both my parents, and I don’t go hungry (most of the time). But it’s hard when I have little to give of myself, other than my time, my effort and my heart. I am partaking in a service learning trip under my faculty to Kiau, a village in Sabah where we will be building a pre-school during the school holidays. I am happy that finally I am given the chance to make a rather large contribution to society. Trouble is, I might still have to raise a little money to pay for my trip there. Sigh.

So… All in all, who am I in this little red dot called Singapore? I’m an aspiring designer, who just wants to give – give my ideas, give money (to my parents), give back to society and give my love to all! 

Love,
Starfish